Nightmare on Price Hill: The Real Story of Price Hill Chili
by: Moose Gronholm
In the cold grey fog of this particular Saturday
William Henry Riley woke himself from a most delightful dream.
Firm in his stance and cold in his eyes
He knew that this tasty surprise
Would bring him desire and money from far and wide.
From his living room bay window on Elberon and West Eighth
He would watch the ladies of pleasure stroll about in a most demoralizing state.
They would stroll on his Hill calling for their Johns
The slamming of car doors when they were done would only egg poor William Riley on.
With his restaurant set to open in a few days time
There was one item left that would only cost a dime.
His Price Hill Chili was the name that was penned,
The secret ingredient is where we shall begin.
Through his living room bay window he watched her catch her thrill
The first of many more to come was young Annie McGill.
She was not nearly twenty with her brown hair and curls,
William Herman Riley was ripe with excitement to hear her deathly shrill.
He sat and watched her for three long days,
Keeping notes in a ledger and filling it page by page.
All the while his disdain for her boiling within
As he peered out the bay window his disdain set off a most cold and evil grin.
He closed his ledger and readied her nightmare
For within his building lay a concrete room to which he would stare.
He readied the torture that befall poor young Annie McGill
And with his grin and plan he became calm and still.
Upon the third day he grabbed his hat and scarf
Recognizing the chill in the air was still pretty sharp.
The dark of the evening had steadily crept in,
And there was young Annie standing on the corner with her back to the wind.
William Riley fixed his cold eyes on young Annie McGill
Like a lion preparing for his next kill.
With patience and methodical precision he watched her every move
To bid his time instead of pouncing to soon.
He stood and watched while leaning on the lamp post
While young Annie caught every John with a toast and a boast.
For pleasure and fun were her two traits,
And William H. Riley could not wait to hear her scream and watch her shake.
She caught her last ride for the evening,
Gave a wink as the steam arose from the sewer cap beneath
William Riley began his walk towards her as the car sped off
Mumbling to himself: there is only one way out Miss Annie and that you will see in a moment's time.
Annie began her walk to her flat
Her feet were tired and she only wanted to relax.
As she walked she could feel someone behind her
But when she turned around the street was bare and she began to stir.
For the black of the evening gave her a frightful chill
She picked up her pace as to not stay still
William Riley was ahead of her peering around the corner
As Annie drew near William dabbed a rag with chloroform.
Within one step, two steps, and on the third the chloroformed rag went over her mouth
With little more than yelp and nor more than a shout.
He draped her over his arm carrying her to his home
William took her around back where the entrance to the basement was set about.
He tied her to the chair that was placed in the middle of the room
Slapped her around to wake her so she could watch her impending doom.
He let her struggle and writhe for he needed to tenderize for his delectable treat.
For two days and nights he held vigil over her seemingly lifeless body.
Annie exhausted from screaming and struggling.
On the third day and that third day's night
He began to quench his thirst and make a bloody sight.
He tied her hands together then tied her feet
Pulled a chord and she flew from her seat.
Now hanging upside down like a piece of meat,
William Riley made a cut to drain her blood methodically and neat.
As her blood went down the drain
William Riley prepped the other ingredients with no disdain.
As the water came to a boil a cold dark washed over his face,
As he watched her hanging from his basement ceiling leaving not a trace.
William Riley made other preparations as well
He sent out invitations to friends and family from in and around the Hill.
A soft opening was what he was planning for these friends and family,
But mainly to gaze upon their faces as the took that first bite of his tasty chili.
With Annie McGill's blood all drained William Riley began dressing her like a deer,
Removing her innards and separating meat from bone with a delightful cheer.
The next afternoon as his chili began to come together
His friends and family gathered for drinks on a chilly November.
They took a seat in the dining hall of Price Hill Chili
They waited patiently as William served his meals
Then one by one they each were served a bowl of his chili
Then one by one they each smiled delightfully and pleasantly,
And one by one each person commenting quickly
"William Riley you have out done yourself for this is amazing and superbly tasty chili."
And with that he sat back and reveled,
As the questions of what was in it he could not reveal
But he would say with the most eerie of grins
"If I were to tell you, I would have to kill you."
And with that little quip came a roar of laughter from those friends and family
William Herman Riley would become infamously famous.
Nightmares are getting served at the PHC
The CEO is going on murder spree
I heard it was he
Who chopped up a nice family of three
Planted bits and pieces of them in his chili recipe
This was a rhyme he would say to himself as he did his deed.
These are the tasty and delectable treats said he
As he slowly concocted his chili recipe
Pursing his lips salivating and sweating
As that sweet chili slowly was simmering.
Customer followed in as their heads began to spin
From the smell of his chili and so tasty they would be let in.
Line formed around the block to which he saw a ticking of a clock.
He had to run for his newest victim was almost done.
His victim was almost ready for his most tasteful batch of chili
The smell was permeating Glenway
And there were no more customers for the day.
He walked the streets for his next victim
And for his customers to eat
He sat on a bench in a park
While the sun set and it began to get dark.
In the moon lit night
A figure in the distance was out of sight
But as it drew near
He felt that chill that he loved so dear
He took some cover behind a tree
As the figure drew near William Riley strangled her,
One, two, three
The next victim for his most delectable chili
"Price Hill will never see the likes of me"
He so proudly boasted
As he grinned and fired up his broaster....
